Shupashupa
continued from A Touch of Spirit
I stood there at Grom’s monument, I could not speak directly what was on my mind or in my heart. Like all things I came at it sideways and from behind.
Buyaga’s rough voice softened some, “Say before our ancestor why it is so. Why these matters of spirit and honor have become important to you now. Perhaps it will help your journey.”
I stood there, rooted in my place. I could not find my voice to say what I had been hinting at all evening. I clenched my fists, crushed my eyes shut and clenched my jaw.
“Fight through the fear.” His voice came to me quietly, “There is no shame in admitting the truth to your ancestors. They see all, anyways.”
And then I knew the truth of it. Here, in this sacred place, it was not just Buyaga listening, that my words would not only be heard by him, but by my ancestors as well! I opened my eyes to find him 20 yards away, utterly motionless like the Grom’s great stone behind me. And once again words began to flow.
“Honored ancestors, Help me to find the right path.
“To find my own honor! A purpose to guide my life!
“Help me to find my way to you! To know your wisdom!
“I have never known these things, nor cared for them before!
“But now...” my voice grew momentarily weaker.
“but now...” I reached a hand behind me, fingertips finding Grommash’s stone, finding my voice.
“There is more at stake. Not just life. A future.
“A future for myself...and another”
I could see Buyaga, still unmoving, an intensely serious expression on his face.
“I have found a noble heart. A great heart...!!”
The faintest motion from Buyaga, his lips barely moving as he spoke my name, “Shupa…”
I could feel Grommash’s strength, from the stone, through my fingertips. My voice gaining strength, “Help me to become worthy.” I raised one hand, pointing at his chest. “To be worthy of HIS great heart!!!” I could not look anymore, turning, I placed both hands flat upon the stone, head bowed, and spoke one last word to our most honored ancestor…*please*
And then he was there, behind me, his great hands, one on each shoulder, “You are worthy.....you already have my heart.
“When I look at you, I do not see what others see. I do not see an assassin, a trickster, a thief. I see honor. I see compassion. I see courage.” He continued, “It is what you already are. You just have to learn to see it. Your quest for honor, for guidance, it inspires me.”
I looked up, craning my neck to see his face so close, “It is who I wish to be. I do not know why you came here. I will trust that it was your ancestors. But I am glad you are here.”
He gave a slight chuckle, “I am glad I am here.” Then more seriously, he looked at the stone behind me, “Honored ancestor. You know me. I know you. I am not sure why you and my other ancestors guided me here. But I know what I must now do.”
I found myself grow silent and still.
“Before you, in this sacred place of our people, I make an oath. As you have guided me, with my other ancestors, so shall I guide Shupashupa. I know you see her as I do. She is strong. She is honorable. She is worthy.”
“And if she shall have me, when she is ready, it would be my greatest honor in life that she be my life-mate. My closest friend. My rock. Unmoving against the tide of darkness in this world.” His face turned down to look me in the eye, “This I vow.”
For a third time, I found words I did not know and actions guided by something else. I turned my gaze to the stone behind me.
“Honored ancestors, I do not hear you well, but I trust that you hear me. I am not yet ready to take this next step in my life. But I will become so!
“I will become Buyaga's rock as he will be my harbor
“He is noble, and brave and...spiritual as well as fierce.
“When the time is right, I will allow him to challenge me to become my life mate.”
I turned my attention back to the Mag’har, a smile playing upon my lips. "As I understand tradition, you still need to best me"
“That is the proper way,” he smiled back.
“Then may the ancestors smile upon you, Buyaga the Unbridled,” my grin widened. “Your course will not be an easy one”
“And know they smile upon you this day, Shupashupa. You name the time and place, and I will prove my devotion. My strength.”
“Honored ancestor, I ask of one thing.” Buyaga looked once more to the cold stone, placing his hand upon it. “I ask that you grant a boon to Shupashupa. As my father has the visions, so to do I ask that you give them to Shupa. Let her -see- you. Let her -see- the path. I never had to see, but every path is different. Her’s, is obscured. Please help her, honored ancestor.” He fell silent, his head bowed in prayer
After a minute or so, he shifted back, “Thank you, Shupa. You have lit a fire in my heart like I have never felt before. I will train until the day you are ready for me to challenge. I do this for you, for me, for us, my ancestors, my honor, and our future.”
“I am honored then, and you have inspired me as well. To seek our ancestors. From the day I met you on that rainy day in Brill, you have not been far from my thoughts. Even on that first night, you swore an oath to me. It left an impression and made me think.”
“Our ancestors have brought us together. That is clear to me, now. You will be my greatest test. My honor and strength will bring us together.”
And then he said it, “You are worthy. I love you, Shupa.” I could feel my eyes grow very large!
Reaching up, he loosened the straps and removed his helmet, exposing his grizzled face, his normal glower replaced by something more vulnerable. “And you are the only woman I have said those words to.”
I could feel the look of shock and pleasure fighting across my face, “I admit, I don't think I ever expected to hear those words from anyone, Buyaga.” I reached up, stetching slightly to place a hand on Buyaga's cheek, "It will take me some time. I need to find my balance before I can declare those words.”
“I understand, Shupa, but I could no longer contain these words. I never thought I would find someone like you, but I have. I do not expect this to be given to me. Nothing worthy of love comes free. I am willing to fight and die for it.”
I had to chuckle, though I did not want to break the mood, “I think they were fairly bursting from you at the Keep that first night. Even so, you have not been far from my thoughts. Not one day passed that I did not wonder if I would see you.”
"I have also considered more practical matters" I gave him a sly look.
“And what might those be?” a little uncertain.
“When the time is right, there may be...complications,” I looked him up and down with a measuring stare, comparing my own size to his bulk.
Understanding flashed in his eyes.
“It is fortunate for you that I am an alchemist,” I reached into my pouch and produced a small vial, bringing it to my lips. Suddenly gaining size and mass, nearly matching his Mag’hari stature, making him grin wickedly.
A laugh escaped me. “Now I can look you in the eye!”
He reached out a hand to gently stroke my face, his hand no longer quite so engulfing. And so I found myself eye to eye with him, and for a moment there was nothing else.
Turning my face to gently rub against his rough hand, “Planning and forethought come with the training, it is in my nature.”
“And swift, decisive action with mine.” He said, gently pulling me closer to him. "Will you allow me one kiss before I go to train, Shupa?"
I returned his gaze, looking deeply into his eyes; leaning forward to kiss him. "Why else do you think I took that elixir?”
His arms, like trees pulled my to him tightly, increasing the intensity of the kiss. His entire demeanor seems to loosen.
He let me go, taking a small step back, “One day....one day soon.”
“Dabu,” I agreed.
I gave him a look and grinned, "You know...it is good you asked about that kiss. The last person who tried to take one now speaks with a cleft tongue *laughing*
I pushed him back, gently, “Go and train, my Great Heart”
He activated his hearthstone, “Go and think on Grom. Let him, if he let's you, enter your dreams.”
I agreed, “Blood and Thunder, Buyaga!”
“Victory or death, Shupa! I will return to you." And he was gone.
I looked one more time a the great stone, “I will be waiting”
Shupa finished her writing and rebound her journal. It had been a long night with Buyaga, and even longer trying to sort it all out with her journal. Tucking her journal away in her bags, she rolled over in the bunk and fell asleep. She didn’t bother to set out her dream catcher.
